Gay 101. Sauna Shenanigans

Sauna’s are part of Gay Culture and whether you frequent them or not, most of us will have at least heard about them.

A friend once said that saunas are like masturbation. 90% of guys go and 10% lie about it. I don’t think this is quite true, but I do believe that most of us are at least a little curious.

Sauna’s, bathhouses or whatever you call them are sex on site venues. This means that you can go there, find a hottie or hotties, take them upstairs and bang or get banged silly. It’s like a cross between a night club and a sex party (which makes it just like Mardi Gras except less fabulous). Most Sauna’s have other facilities like Hot tubs, pools, gyms, massages, movie rooms, steam rooms etc. Some have small rooms filled with mirrors, others have glory holes, slings, small beds and porn theatres but most resemble a maze of small cubicles. In Australia all sex on site venues are also required to have free lube and condoms available.

Why guys go.

I remember before I came out Saunas provided me with a safe place in which to explore and have some of my first experiences with other guys. Sauna’s provide an important safe place for those members of the GLBTI community who do not feel comfortable going to clubs to pick up, or who may not be able to come out. They are also much safer than beats which can result in bashing or unwanted brushes with the law. For those of us who just get plain horny it cuts out the middle man (personally I like being the middle man). And for those of you who think it’s only an “older mans” game, I can declare that to be untrue. The under 30’s night at one of the local Melbourne Saunas has been running for about 2 years now and it always goes off!

So many guys go “Oooo, no I would never do that”, they squeal and go “eeek, a dirty sauna”, but seriously I don’t see a problem. Sex is to be enjoyed and as long as you play safely and responsibly there is no reason why you can’t enjoy yourself.

If you are planning to explore or go to a sauna yourself, then there are a few things you should be aware of.


It’s a sex on site venue but that doesn’t mean it’s a free for all. One of the things that turns many young guys off is the constant pestering from guys who just can’t take no for an answer. Always try to be friendly, saying a polite no thank you and then walking away should be enough. Sometimes however a stern FUCK OFF! unfortunately is need. If that doesn’t work then find a staff member and advise them. Remember this goes the other way too.

Be Aware.

Being aware of what is going on around you is important especially when it comes to safe sex. It’s very easy to get caught up in things and before you know it you may be doing something you don’t want to do. Remember you are in charge. Speak up and don’t be afraid to be loud. Drugs can be an issue. Be careful. Most venues won’t let you in if they think you are on drugs and nearly all will ask you to leave if they catch you doing drugs inside. Drugs and Saunas are a recipe for disaster. Never believe a guy who says that the condoms there are to small and refuses to wear one… try inflating one… they’re huge!

Go with a friend.

It may not always be possible but if you’re going for the first time or you are a little nervous, going with a friend is a good way to start. As wingmen you can watch out for each.

Have Fun.

Sex is something to be enjoyed. Play safe and be assertive about what you want and don’t want. Some of the hottest encounters I have ever had have been in a Sauna. Remember nearly everyone will be there with the intention of hooking up so don’t be afraid to let the object of your desire know you are interested. Eye contact is preferred as many guys don’t enjoy being groped in the dark. Remember it’s all about respect.

Oh and if you see a family member while cruising the the sauna, remember he’s there for the same reason your are.