Gay 101. Taming those wandering hands.

Touching is one of the most intimate things a person can do. Brushing hair out of somebodies face, gently kissing a neck and any other physical contact can convey all kinds of emotions.

But what happens when those wandering hands begin to take control. What happens when you simply can’t help yourself.

We have all been there. Walking through the club and feeling an indiscriminate hand pinching our butt or being the perp ourselves in a drive by groping.

There is no doubt that it’s all about context and (at the risk of being politically incorrect), that the thin line between feeling flattered and violated depends on how attracted we are to the person doing it.

When you get the urge to reach out and touch somebody consider for a moment what you are about to say about yourself. Nobody wants to be the creepy guy in the club and not everybody will see your playful flirting as appropriate. Imagine how you might feel as the victim of a fly by groping, would you feel flattered or objectified? Will you feel flirty or dirty?

Flirting is hard enough without startling your would be beau with a crippling nipple twist or bruised buttocks. I once was bitten so hard on my nipple that it drew blood. Ever since that day any kind of contact with my nipples has been an instant off switch. Touch is powerful but resist the urge to jump on the object of your affection twisting nipples, pinching buttocks and crushing balls. Gentle moderation is the new black, nobody wants to be mauled. The sensation of touch is a powerful aphrodisiac and is an important tool in your pick up bag. Gently touching a guys leg and letting your lips brush his neck or ear all the while you whisper to him, will often get your mans very swift attention.

If you want your guy to notice you, a smile and gentle touch on the shoulder or arm will let him know your keen and still show some class. Save the mauling for the bedroom.