It matters who I call friend.

Last weekend I headed out for the Queens Birthday celebration here in Australia. The party I was going to was naturally themed around the big event and knowing that every Twink with an Instagram was going to be out in a crown I decided I was going to go with the Punk theme. I didn’t go full Punk but I did borrow from the style and pulled out my Kilt, long socks, Hail Satan tank and jockstrap – and before you start saying Scots don’t wear anything under their kilts remember I’m not Scottish.

The Kilt is always a hit but this is the first time that I decided to wear it to the venue rather than change there and it was also the first time that I’ve worn it on public transport. Walking up Chapel street feeling free and breezy was quite the treat and as I grow more and more confident with my own style doing these kinds of things feels more and more empowering but thats another post for another day.

Walking down the street drew a few wolf whistles from the ladies, bad Scottish accents and one drunken fool screaming the lyrics to “dirty deeds done dirt cheap” in my face. I love a bit of AC/DC but not laced with beer spittle. One Gent grabbed me, put his arm around me and said to his mates, “this guy is my Scottish friend”. Without even thinking I said “no I’m not” and kept on walking. I was a little bit surprised by how quick my response was and I felt it was a mean response to someone who was just being friendly but as I thought about it more I realised that the truth is that I know who my friends are.

As I get older those relationships mean more and more to me and who I call friend becomes more and more precious. In the past I’ve called people friends who have let me down and thats held an uncomfortable mirror up to myself. Okay random drunk guy was being perfectly harmless and I shut him down but I have friends who have driven 10 hours interstate to bring me home, who have dropped everything to console me in the middle of the night, who have supported me when I had nothing and who have talked me down from ledges in my darkest moments, they have hugged me in tragedy and held me up in triumph. Calling him friend just didn’t come to me in that moment.

You gotta earn it.

 

 

 

 

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